SURRENDER

When I was a little girl my mom enrolled my brother and me in swim lessons. I don’t have a ton of memories from swim lessons but I do remember the terror I felt when the teacher had us jump in the deep end for the first time. I remember walking up to the edge tears already running down my face. I didn't know this lady, how was I going to be sure she would catch me? I was so scared that the swim teacher would let me drown that I didn’t end up jumping in the pool that day. 

Fear stopped me in my tracks and told me that making the jump was too risky. Fear told me to stay comfortable. Because of fear I missed out on the thrill of the jump and the relief of being caught.     

As I enter seasons of life that require full surrender to God I am taken back to the terror of standing on the edge of that pool. What if I jump and He lets me drown? What if I put my trust in Him and He lets me down? These questions haunt me as I enter a season where I’m unsure of where God is taking me. I find my controlling instincts start to kick in. 

But, I don’t need to fear the jump. I need to fully surrender to my Teacher and trust that He will catch me because He will.  

Complete surrender is a vulnerable place. It requires us to give God full control. If you're anything like me I have to let go over and over again. I made a promise to God the other day that anytime I got anxious about the future I would stop what I was doing and say “surrender”. This simple reminder prompts me to breathe and loosen my grip. God is working it all out. 

I need to let God be God because I am not. 

I eventually jumped in the deep end of a pool. I don’t remember the exact moment but I’m sure it was scary and awesome all at the same time. I’m sure when it was over I came up to the top and wanted to do it all over again. 

When we put our full trust in God and take that jump we come up to the top not knowing what we were scared of in the first place. All the walls of fear we built come crumbling down and we are met with an overwhelming sense of relief. Because we realize He had us all along. He wasn't trying to harm us, He was preparing us for the prospering.  

Letting go isn't easy. Most of the time you will feel like you’re in over your head. It is in those moments that we must cling to our Father. Tell Him you’re scared. He will meet you with peace every time.  

I leave you with the words of Sonia Ricotti, 

“Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.”